God is our Great Teacher… AND He can use YOU to teach others (ME)

My almost adult son came to me and told me he didn’t believe in what I believed in anymore.  Immediately felt punched in the gut.  Tried to hide and and be understanding and caring. He has questions and doubts.  He proceeded to tell me parents brainwash their children into believing the same things they believe.

I am convicted and want to connect with my son and understand.  We as parents place our values and beliefs onto our children.  We want what is best for them and therefore, we model (brainwash?) and live the life we want our children to have.  Did I brainwash my child?  I don’t think this is a black and white answer and I need help in understanding.  No, I don’t think I brainwashed my child.  I am using the term he used when explaining his feelings to me.  It is how he views this so I want to explore his understanding.

This got me to thinking about when I became a believer in my God.  I don’t remember a time where I didn’t believe but I do remember a time when I didn’t “know” God.  I certainly didn’t walk with God for the first 20 some years of life.  Not that it really matters, but I wanted to look back when I started believing so I could understand where my son is coming from.

There is a lot of advice on parenting and instilling beliefs in our children.  It can be overwhelming.  I’m not saying I stink at raising my kids, but I do wonder if I missed the mark on how to help my children “Know” God, rather than just know about who he is.

Through prayer, devotions, activities, service, guidance, doing life with our kids, and the list goes on, we still did not help them find/have a relationship with God.  We had all of these wonderful things in place, still I found myself with a child who is doubting.  My kids know about God, but I’m not sure about the relationship part.  Maybe that comes later like it did for me?  I guess I assumed that since I was raising my kids as Christians that they would eventually develop a relationship with Christ.  I’m weeding out confusion and searching for answers about this.

I’m not knocking the way my parents raised me AT ALL when I say this.  Growing up the only thing I knew for sure was that there was a God I had to confess to, I had say the Lords Prayer and when I went to bed I would say the “Now I lay me down to sleep” prayer every night.  That was my knowledge of God until my 20’s.  I’m wondering from those of you who were raised with Bible teachings, attended church as children, prayed with your parents, had other role models around you, etc., how did you develop your faith?  I don’t want to keep hounding my friends and my mom did pass away and my dad and I don’t talk about things like this.  So I’m needing some answers.  I have surrendered it to God and I know he is the great teacher.  I know he can also use YOU to teach as well.

I do have an understanding that I came to a relationship with God in my own time, and that is what may happen with my kids.  Is there something I could be doing to instill that relationship?  I wasn’t taught this and I came about my relationship with God on my own.  Well, maybe not on my own completely, I do believe people were possibly planting seeds or praying for me.  I’d like to think so anyway.

Any advice or can you tell me how you came to your relationship with God?

psalm 32_8 i will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; i will counsel you with my eye upon you.

 

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16 thoughts on “God is our Great Teacher… AND He can use YOU to teach others (ME)

  1. In raising three daughters, modeling what was expected by them was a key point. We were active in church with excellent attendance, participating in youth activities, and being active in other ways. We networked with other parents in church and school. We lived in a smaller community so we had some advantages over living in an urban area. We supported our daughters in their church and school endeavors, but we allowed them to make choices about what to do. I will pray for you and your son along with the rest of your family.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you for your prayers. I’m honored you would do that for me, a complete stranger. Moving forward, we will need to get stronger in modeling and participating.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I was a PK (Preacher’s Kid) Like it or not the Bible was drilled into me and my siblings. I accepted the Lord at the age of 11. However many years later when I was struck with Fibromyalgia is when my relationship with God took on a whole new meaning. As someone else already mentioned ask him about his doubts. Make sure the conversation does not get combative pretty much just listen. Most importantly pray and I’ll keep you and your family in my prayers.

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  3. Right now my hardest prayer for my grown children is for the Lord to continue to draw them to Him. To continue to put people in their way that lead them to turn to Jesus. I know this will most likely cause them hurts & pain as He does that. Their eternal life is what matters the most to me. The Lord knows all, knows the desires of a Mothers heart for her children, & hurts with us when we hurt for our children. He loves them more than we can. May the love the Lord has for your son give you comfort when your heart is aching. I will include your family in my prayer.

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  4. This must be so hard for you. First, I agree with the other commenters that prayer is key. Begin praying at least daily that God will reveal himself in an intimate way to your son. Let your son know that you are praying that prayer for him. Let him know that he can pray the same prayer even if he doesn’t really believe in God. Let him know that he can pray, as many throughout history have, “You probably aren’t even real God but if you are show me.” Remind him that you love God and have a relationship with him because of the awesome ways he changed your life, guided you, comforted you. Explain that you had to share that with him and encourage him to find what you did because it is so valuable to you. Use the example of a good friend, a new tech product, a great movie, etc. You want to tell everybody about it because of how much you liked it and it helped you. Reassure him that no matter how if he believes right now or not, you will still love him and be there for him because that is how God treats you. May your whole family be drawn closer to Christ because of this difficult trial. I prayed for you and your son and will continue to do so. Please post updates or feel free to find me on Facebook or Instagram and message me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow thank you so much for your encouragement, wisdom and especially prayers. I will find you on fb/Instagram also. I love the way you said to pray and ask him to pray even if he doesn’t believe. Thank you!!!!!

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  5. I agree with the other comments. However, I would like to add a thought or two. The Word reminds us that,

    “ we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of [a]the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.”

    That being said I would also pray and bind up any forces that are causing your son any confusion/deception and then release the Spirit of truth and an increase of supernatural faith. We know by 1 Corin 14:33 God is not the author of confusion. Yes the lifestyle of a believer may have been something to just follow or do because it’s how he was brought up however like you said the relationship aspect of it sometimes doesn’t come off so clear.

    My eldest is going through this as well. Although she was one to receive the baptism of the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in tongues a few years ago. Completely on fire for God more than myself and then bam. She came home one day and said it just didn’t make any sense to her any more. It’s been tough but I also get it. She’s trying to sort things out and find out what God really means to her, relationship wise. All we can to as parents is pray and exercise our God given authority and power to bind up and cast down the principalities that threaten to take hold of our future mighty men and women of God. I’ll add you and your family to my prayer time.

    God Bless

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  6. I love your writing – really honest and from the heart. This topic touches my heart. As parents we do the best we can to model, teach and encourage spiritual growth. But in the end, God is the one who calls and who saves. And it is in His sovereignty and grace that we live. We can be the best evangelist and it is still not in our power to determine who is saved. Even Billy Graham had a “prodigal son.” It is no reflection on you.
    Even kids who come back to the Lord go through a time of questioning and making the faith they grew up with, their own. The very best we can do is to stand in the gap and be intercessors, praying for God to draw them to Himself. I often pray the 3 Cs. Contacts. Circumstances. Conviction.
    That God would bring contacts, people into their lives who will be a godly influence and role models that they will listen to (since they are not listening to parents so much anymore).
    That God would use their circumstances to draw them to Him: either bless them so greatly they would not be able to deny He is at work in their lives, or if there are challenging or even painful circumstances, that He will not let them be wasted, but give them direction and comfort as they call out to Him.
    That the Holy Spirit would convict their hearts personally about sin in their lives and a need for a Savior.
    Continue to listen and be a blessing to your child – almost adult. God is the author and perfecter of our faith and He has promised to complete the good work He began in us, and in our children.
    And lastly, I want to welcome you to DailyBiblePrayer.wordpress
    May God bless you with encouragement, direction and protection as you grow in your relationship with Him through the scriptures and spending time in prayer!
    Be sure to click on the scriptures at the bottom to read and see what God will share with you personally!
    Laura

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Laura you blessed me with your encouragement and your advice. I copied this and sent it to a few people. I have never thought of the 3 C’s. I’m adding this to my prayer life. I will be touching base with you on Daily Bible Prayer. Thank you for reaching out.

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  7. There are three books that I would recommend to you:
    1. “Turning to Jesus” by Scot McKnight. This will help you see the dynamics in your son about struggling with a faith he has been raised up in and dealing with appropriating it to himself.
    2. “The King Jesus Gospel” by Scot McKnight. This will help you have language for what the Christian faith is asking your son to actually believe. There is a lot of things connected to Christianity, some good and some bad, but there is only one gospel we are being asked to give ourselves to completely. This is all you should push your son towards.
    3. “Following Jesus” by N.T. Wright. This little book goes over some of the major themes of Christian belief and through a few books of the Bible examining what it means to actually follow King Jesus. I would read this one yourself, really drinking in the wisdom provided, and then pass it on to your son if he seems interested.

    Such a position is not a rare place to be in American Christianity and my prayers are for you and others. As an academic in biblical studies I don’t have all the answers by any means about the whole of Christianity, but I’m more than willing to email with your son about topics or texts he has questions about.

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